I have two machines in my home office, and the combined noise of both of them running was getting to my head. When I purchased a new machine, it was even louder than the old machine, and I decided to make a muffler for it. The idea started out as a simple box that would have taken two days to finish, then some idiot said "Hey, why don't you make it look like a Tardis?" - And that instantly turned it into a two-week project.

Before begining this project, I did purchase quiet "Silencer" fans, a quiet power supply, and tried to install some foam around the computer case. It was helpful, but not enough. I do think this did help the overall noise, so buying these items was not a waste. I took out the foam once I realized it didn't really help to quiet my PC, but only rather made it hotter.

One of the main goals of a quieter PC was not to make it slow, remove fans, and add expensive heat sinks. Some referance material suggested underclocking your CPU (yes "under"), and others simply suggested not overclocking. Both my machines are overclocked, so that just wasn't going to happen. Instead, the goal was to make it as fast as possible, shove in as many harddrives as I wanted, and make as fast or as loud as I wanted - then make the surroundings quiet. This was important, since a specialty computer, that is nice and quiet, will be out of date in 8 months anyway. The box allowed me to upgrade my systems at any time, without have to ever worry about noise ever again.

Originally, it was going to be a chest, like one of those pirates' chests that you can buy at Cost-Plus or Ross'. I was going to buy a stock chest to put the machines in, and simply line it with foam and add vents. The idea of an upright box came about when it was presented to me that a chest on the floor consumes allot of space, and that all the airspace above it was basically dead space. Since you generally cannot put anything on a chest that you expect to open, it would take up 36 inches by 22 inches on the floor. The upright design would have to be larger than a chest model (48x24), since the fans would have to be placed differently. But even though it would be larger than a chest model, the smaller footprint made it the better choice.

After some investigation, I could not find a stock chest in the stores that was large enough, so I decided I would have to build my own. Given that, all design considerations were now open, and I didn't have to shoehorn my PC's into someone else's box. I was free to build as I pleased, and the upright Tardis was it.

I wanted a chest, since the ones you can buy look nice, but now I had to figure how to make it look nice on my own. Appearance was important to me. The box was going to get painted black, and I was planning on either gluing those nice artsy posters to the side of it and then feather airbrush the poster into the box so you couldn't tell it was a poster, or put black lacquer on it to make it nice and shiny. Lucky me, some idiot at work blurted out "Hey, why don't you make it look like a Tardis?". Once the seed of a cool idea is planted in your brain, you can't remove it try as you may. Fortunately, the design of a upright box was exactly 1/2 scale of a full size Tardis. The Tardis turned out to be a very cool idea, and it's a lamp too!

Another thing that greatly assisted in the upright design decision was the acquisition of twin 120-volt fans from Target. Since I made this unit in September, Target was getting rid of all fans, and I got a twin fan assembly for a whopping $5. Scored! 120 volt means independent of any power supply too.

Some of the specs for the box consisted of: 1) The air vents had to be facing away from the front. Side or bottom would have been fine. 2) The air vents had to be large and evenly spaced, not to starve the fans of air. 3) It had to be large enough for two computers. 4) It must provide easy access to the machines, yet be airtight when closed. 5) The door had to have stair-step foam capabilities (i.e., the door could not be flat) 6) The air had to flow diagonally through the machines. It had to enter from one corner, and exit through the opposite corner. This would prevent stale and hot air from collecting on one side. 7) The cables had to be squished with foam such that no air or sound could escape from the cable exit opening. 8) The vent nearest the fan had to be double folded to conceal any fan noise. 9) The fan had to be removable in case it ever broke. 10) The fan had to be on it's own power supply in case one or both machine was turned off / failed. 11) The front and side faces needed to be double insulated with foam and then egg carton foam 12) The interior vertical shelves needed only egg carton foam 13) The fan had to be suspended in foam so as not to transmit any fan noise through the box

From the photos, you can see that I cut the sides of the door on an angle. This was to allow a larger opening at the top, and also provide a slanted mating surface for the top and bottom seal. I placed weather-stripping around the edge of the door, and the angle allows a firm compressed seal around the top and bottom of the door. The sides did not require this since the door was cut around the to the side, and not flat in the front ("C" shaped door).

The rear cable exit door was filled with foam, and a latch was placed on it to hold the foam firmly against the computer cables. The door was made 2" by 2", and was plenty large enough to hold 2 sets of network, sound, monitor, mouse, keyboard, and accessory cables that both machines needed. Although a 2-inch door is not large, the fact that it opens into a 2 inch by 8-inch hole, allows me to put all the cables through, then close the door on the wires after hooking everything up.

The front Instruction Sheet was printed on a colour copier, and then glued to a sheet of file folder cardboard. I used a rolling pin to make it flat and smooth. I then sprayed a clear coat finish to seal in the colour and protect the surface in case some idiot spills Dr Pepper on it or something. Hopefully it won't fade over time.

The black Police Public Call Box logos were printed out on a regular printer, and then photocopied to increase their size. I used the same 'glue to file folder cardboard' technique to firm them up. I then made cutouts to cover the font, and spray-painted the rest black to get a really jet-black look to them. After it dried, I sprayed a clear coat finish on them to seal in the photocopy toner, and make it all look jet-black and shiny. Yes, I am a perfectionist.

The first light I made was from a garden lamp. It sucked so I replaced it with one that matched the real Tardis better. It is just 4 dowels and a jam jar.

The entire Tardis was built using only a hammer and a hand-held circular saw. I do not have a tablesaw. The straight lines were cut by nailing a straight board on top of a throwaway working surface (another board). The staight board was used as a guide, and I cut through into the working board. Without a table saw this was the best I could do.

In total, it cost me about $150 to put this together. The most expensive items being lumber - $50 and egg carton foam - $45. Glue $3.99. Hinges and latches $8, nails $4, screws $3, paint $7, wood filler and sandpaper $5 (two tubes of filler), and front door knob - 59 cents. The electrical light components were about $13. The glass light on top is a jam jar from Vons. I got it sandblasted at a trailer hitch shop so it would look frosted. It was $4 just for the stupid jam. Who would pay $4 for jam unless they were making a Tardis?!?

The last thing I did was get some of that foam copper pipe insulation (1 inch diameter) to put all the wires in. Check out the last photos around the baseboards, and you can see the charcoal tubes of foam that I stuffed all the wires in. I got the large 1 inch insulation, and it holds all the network, video, power etc cables for both machines just fine.

In the end, I am quite happy with the results. You cannot hear the computers, but you can hear a base rumble from the fans. When you open the door, you hear this loud hissing noise from the machines, and it drowns out this base rumble - so the rumble was always there, it is just that now you can hear it because everything else is so quiet. I know base sounds are hard to get rid of, so I don't think it is a flaw in the design. I think I have done everything I can to remove the sound. I would not say that the machines are "mute", but rather that they are really really quiet. A leaf blowing outside is louder, but yet if you listen carefully, you can still hear that "something is going on inside the box".

The first day I had it installed in my office and put the computers inside it, it was very strange. I could see the monitor was on, and I was using the computer, but it was very strange to not hear the sound. It was like the machine was not even on. I had become so accustomed to hearing the noise of the machine that when it was absent, it didn't feel like it was usable.

As far as temperature goes, the fans are really powerful (they can blow papers around the room), and drop the CPU temperature 10 degrees Celsius from normal operation. When I first bought my new machine, it was running at 58 or so degrees CPU temp, now it is down to 48C. That's about an 18 degree Fahrenheit difference for the Americans out there. I think that's allot, and will extend the life of the machines, and any future machine I put in there.

I disabled the fans of the computers (all internal case fans except CPU fans and video card fan). The entire cooling comes from the large window fan (the "Target" fan). It is very cool with this, and CPU and mother board tempurature are lower than before.

If I was to change something, I would test the sound volume of the fans' low pitch sounds before installing it. I would probably balance the fans by adding rubber bands to the blades before putting it in. I could still do this, but it would mean taking the computers out and I don't want to do that today because I am lazy. :-) I will probably do this after it's been operating for a while, since the fans will need oil after a couple months of operation. The fans run 24/7, as do the computers.

Update: I have re-done this page, and report that after years of continuous operation, the 120 volt fans still run perfectly. They have been running since Sept 2001. I have a brand new backup fan still waiting in the garage in case it ever dies on me, but the fan has been blowing air through the unit without a problem since installation. I have upgraded my harddrives and machine more than once, and the box continues to keep my computers quiet regardless of the machine configuration.

Mail me if you have any questions at [email protected]

If I was to make second Quiet PC box, I would probably make it in one of these alternate configurations, as a Glasgow Police Box (red), a British Phone Booth, or the WOPR from the 1983 movie War Games.